End to a crazy year

こんにちは～

久々にブログを書きたくなりました！

Every year comes and goes full of excitement, memories (the good and bad), new experiences and many challenges. But I don't think any year challenged me as much at 2013 so far.

I had wanted to post so much more, but maybe I will have more chance to this year!

I heard a fair few people say, "Oh 2013 isn't that memorable!" But, particularly for me, 2013 marks a massive turning point in my life.

I'd fallen into a fairly dark place, during my first year of university in 2012 and decided I'd had enough of sleeping through lectures and bludging my way through tutorials. It wasn't that I didn't try, of course, I did. But when a lecturer tells you in your film class―that should be open to interpretation―that your essay is wrong, despite providing reasons for why you have interpreted it in such a way... Well, hit me really hard. Everything became a chore except for the class I took out of rebellion, the story book making and comic making class. That really kept me going throughout the year and it was the only thing I actually tried in after my lecturer's comments gradually chewed away at my self esteem.

So I'd had enough, and I deferred my course for a year pursuing a dream I'd held since I the end of primary school―to study Japanese. Both my primary school and high school were in a region where only Italian was offered as a second language subject. And since going overseas was also a big dream of mine, I did the extra year of Italian just to go on the school trip. But we didn't have enough numbers, and to my dismay it was cancelled. I would have preferred to learn Japanese over Italian, but I always tried my best.

In March, 2013, my course began. I missed orientation due to work and so the first lesson was like a second orientation day so everyone could get to know each other. Maybe some people already knew each other, but after a whole year of clinging to a high school friend at my previous uni and not making any friends; I was more than just nervous. My class had its oddballs (including myself), but I got to know so many wonderful people. The hours made it feel like high school again, Monday-Thursday usually around 9am-3pm.
We had a different teacher every day, which was amazing, three Japanese native teachers and one Australian teacher who may as well have been a native speaker.

To be completely honest, I was never much of a diligent student in high school, especially my last few years. I dropped everything to do with maths and science, because I was confident that "I didn't need it". But when it came to Japanese I would study at home after school, I studied very slowly at my own pace only using the internet as my textbook. I learnt to write hiragana and katakana (not correctly, mind you. So many sites on the internet try to teach you the computer font rather than written script!). I also learnt very basic grammar and slowly started to build a vocabulary. So I went into my first class in 2013 with some knowledge under my belt.
Even though I knew a lot of the content we were studying, I studied every day. I even studied at work during the quiet periods. I got better marks that I ever had in my life and finished my first semester with a score of 99 for term one and 96 for term two, my exam marks included in this. I almost couldn't believe it.

It was around the middle of the first semester that I started to change as a person before I even knew what was going on. Cosplay, my long time hobby since 2009 had become so hard to fit in to my schedule, became majorly stressful as the much awaited (and ironically became the final Manifest convention ever) Manifest 2013 was soon approaching. Not only was I working a ridiculous amount of hours, I was rehearsing my speech for the Japanese Speech Contest in Melbourne (which I'll talk about next) every day, and I was attempting the most difficult cosplay I had ever tried to make in my life―little did I know, it would be my last. (At least for now!)
Ulquiorra Schiffer in his final form. I'm a woman and I laughed at the pure insanity of this idea. But I managed to pull it off and I was really proud of what I managed to pull off in a ridiculously short amount of time. Considering how little sewing there was to be done, I thought it would fail, sewing is usually my field. But I made most of my pieces with little to no sewing. I even attached my ridiculously large horns on the day of the convention―and they were surprisingly comfortable!

Photos thanks to Neil Creek Photography

This was around the time I had fallen into a massive slump since I was denied concession fees for my Japanese course, so I wasn't able to afford some of my course. My teacher was kind enough to allow me to home study and work to pay for the just the final term. But being away from class had really degraded me in so many ways. I worked really hard and only just managed to scrape by and attend Certificate IV, the final term of my course. But I don't regret it. I came back and straight away we were preparing for camp, where we met a group of students who came from Hokkaido on a study tour to my university. Everyone was so lovely!

I was once again able to concentrate on study and I passed Certificate IV with 94% overall! I expected to do much worse! Less than a week later, we departed for our Japan Study Tour.

As the beginning of 2014 was drawing near, I began to plan my study and move to Japan. It was tough, and there were a lot of times I thought I wouldn't be able to afford it or that my application wouldn't make it on time. But in the end, a school in Sapporo is likely to accept me and I'm looking forward to starting a new life there!! \(^^)/

I know that this year was tough in many ways, and I will face many challenges in 2014, but I believe that this massive step for me is a leap towards achieving my dream. I will work harder than ever and strive no matter what obstacles I've faced with. I've found happiness, now I want to reach my dream.
I'm not giving up ever.

If you read this, thank you. If you didn't bother, I don't blame you! Hahaa!

I want to start blogging more this year on my life and experiences in Japan, so please look forward to it!! ^^

_チョコ